Dating someone going through a messy divorce dating in vermont
Remember, it's not your job as a friend to take sides as much as it is to support and be there for her and him.If the female half of the couple is asking you to drop her ex from your friend list, tell her—as kindly as you can—that you're there to be her friend, but you're not actually angry with her ex, says Lancer.You may find that your friend is in tighter financial straits immediately after her divorce, particularly if she was a stay-at-home mom during the marriage, or has had to move because she could no longer afford the mortgage.This sudden change in lifestyle may make her retreat a bit more from her social life.
"Divorcing spouses often find they lose friends and are excluded from events they normally attended, which is a shame," says Swann.
Your own kids may also be full of questions, such as why their friends' dad (or mom) isn't living at their house anymore or whether you're on the road to divorce, too.
Answer their specific questions as they arise ("Yes, Jen and Joe's dad lives in a different place now, but he still loves them very much") without trying to over explain.
Keep in mind, too, that just because the news comes as a shock to you, the same might not apply for her; she may have been thinking about it, and discussing it with her spouse, for years before the announcement.
One thing that is certain: Berating her for making a mistake won't help, says Swann.
There's no denying that divorce is hardest on the couple and their children.