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The antithesis of sexy is to say, ‘I’m having a hot flash.
That’s why I don’t want to hug you right now.’ But it’s a reality, and these things are hard to discuss in an intimate relationship with someone who hasn’t been in this journey with me the entire time. It will never be the same."I did have a double mastectomy, and I just had my third reconstruction.
So I ended up figuring out who could handle things and who couldn’t.
During chemo, I was closest with one person — I guess you could say we were in a relationship, but we were more friends, and we’re still friends to this day."[Being] diagnosed at an early stage, I was given a lot of steroids.
When I was diagnosed, I’d had biopsies and benign lumps removed before.
You could tell some stuff had happened due to scarring. I think this misconception that — like, I didn’t get a boob job.
I am loathe to reduce the probabilities by throwing in a minor disfigurement.
So even though I was going through chemo, I gained 24 pounds in three months.
And I made a comment about my weight, and he was like, ‘You look great.’ And it was something that simple that was a nice boost.
How do you think cancer affected that social aspect of your life? And I’m sure this experience put that into stark relief for you. Some people will say that the last thing they want is to be having sex during treatment.
"I think, back at 37, I wanted to prioritize and say, But that was also my world then, and I look where I am now, with a full-time job — I also have a 4-year-old daughter, because life wasn’t adventurous enough! It was kind of an extreme example of recognizing that your comfort is paramount. And I actually loved dating, even though I acknowledge that I’ve made some bad choices. But then the other side will say that it was the most empowering thing I could do in this situation in which I felt all agency had been taken from me. They can have sex."I think the thing people wonder about dating while going through breast cancer is worrying about losing their breasts — is that something you grappled with? So I would have a round of chemo, and then I’d have to go back three days in a row to get IVs to deal with the side effects. I knew my boobs looked different, but I was so focused on getting to the end of treatment.